As a career coach, I consider it my job to be there for clients and support them — even comfort them — whether or not we might be friends in real life. And that includes laying aside any political differences. Or so I had hoped.
But one day a client contacted me. She had some very specific job search needs and job environment compatibility requirements. And in explaining them to me during our first call, I realized we strongly differed in our voting choices.
Setting political differences aside
Although I had a quick inner voice discussion with myself about my ability to serve her needs, I decided that my job was to do just that. Regardless of my beliefs. It was just politics … she hadn’t committed a heinous crime.
But I also felt it only fair to explain to her about my own beliefs. And we each took some time to consider whether to continue. Could we work together despite the difference?
We decided it was worth trying. And so I began asking her basic coaching questions about her work experience and what she was looking for. And what she thought her obstacles to finding the right job might be.
Coaching had begun
But in listening to just how specific her needs were, including finding a politically compatible workplace, I again started feeling some doubts. I knew I could help her on the technical job search aspects of her quest, but was I really the best coach for her?
Part of me wanted to help her. I knew that. She was bright and clearly sincere in what she was looking for now. She’d had enough of being in the political minority at other jobs and wisely wanted a better fit. Especially since being open about her beliefs was important to her.
But another part of me felt myself increasingly distanced by what that fit really meant for our coaching relationship. And for our mutual exploration of the types of places that might be right for her, since that’s what she was also asking for help with. I just couldn’t comfortably and wholeheartedly immerse myself enough in that world … and didn’t really want to.
A professional coach, just like a good therapist, should be able to rise above political differences. Yet I finally had to admit (first to myself) that I was ignoring something critical to her best interest. And even though we both tried to make it work, I let her know this wasn’t working for me. And therefore for her. And it was my shortcoming.
Political differences — so hard now
I’m sure anyone reading this already knows how difficult things have become. And interestingly enough, not just in this country. It seems to be something going on all over the world.
I’m not proud that I couldn’t be there for my client. And it says a lot to me that she was ready to give our coaching relationship a go even knowing about our different beliefs. I hope she found a place that feels like home. We all deserve that in a job.
All that said, I’m sure that I’ve coached many people with different beliefs from mine. And this was a special case where her job search was all about her political differences … and finally finding a place with like-minded co-workers because she was so adamant in her views.
Sometimes we have to know when we’re not the right fit for a client. Or a job. In this case, it just took us both a few sessions to admit it. But we parted wishing each other well. If only the rest of the world could do that!
⇒ EXTRA: Boss Pushes Political Views at Work
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