I’m an introvert. And I can happily work from home for long periods of time. But a friend of mine, Delia, just wrote me about her experience returning to the office after over a year away: “I didn’t realize how social I am!” she told me, adding how depressed she had been when forced to work from home day after day.

We see lots of articles about employees working from home and loving it. And that might leave the impression that getting to work in your pajamas or sweat clothes is everyone’s idea of perfection

“Didn’t realize what was missing”

Delia didn’t realize just how depressed she was. Between her kids’ needs and work and finding time to spend with her husband — and of course the extra layer of protecting everyone from COVID — her days were so busy she pretty much assumed she was just tired. [Read more…]

At this holiday time, as the new year beckons, I figured it might be nice to add a quick post about one of my favorite, easy ways to give. It’s a site called Free Rice. (This link goes to an English spelling quiz, just one of the available categories. More on that later.)

While it’s not a glamorous site and has been around for many years, it’s still a simple, fun way to give a little gift of food … playing every day if you want. For each question you answer right, the site gives the cash equivalent of 10 grains of rice to the United Nations World Food Programme.

According to the World Food Programme site, they are “the leading humanitarian organization saving lives and changing lives, delivering food assistance in emergencies and working with communities to improve nutrition and build resilience.” Not a bad thing as we remember those individuals and families all around the world who need help and a chance to live with dignity.

How does FreeRice.com work?

[Read more…]

Hope your day is going well. As for me … I’m sitting here thinking about career topics … and what my next post should be. Are there things about jobs and careers I haven’t covered yet that you’re thinking about? I’d love to hear from you.

So much about our world has changed. And, although many things about job search and work stay the same basically, some things have changed there too. Maybe forever. And perhaps now you have a different perspective. Or feel different about what you want out of your work life — and work-life balance.

Out of the approximately 300 career topics I’ve created titles for over the years (just sitting as unpublished drafts), many of them don’t quite feel right anymore — especially after all we’ve been through this past year. And I know that there are many more topics I haven’t come up with yet that probably need writing.

So I decided to let you, my wonderful readers, suggest career topics for my next posts. Or at least basic areas of interest you would like to see covered. Even if maybe indirectly related.

While I can’t promise I will take them all on (or know enough about each and every career topic to do so), I would appreciate knowing what’s on your minds. And what kinds of posts might be the most helpful to you.

Also, if you have a situation you want to share — even if just to get it out — feel free to tell us about it. Just don’t use your real name if it in any way might reflect badly on a boss or co-worker. Or if it might come back to haunt you later on for whatever reason. 😉

Thanks. Looking forward to hearing from you!

~ Ronnie Ann

It’s all about the balance.  Even if we don’t lose our jobs (when you might also lose some of those work friends), having most of our social life center around job social life and work-based relationships never really gets you away from the job.

At least on some level, with a job social life you always bring your work with you. And, in many ways, work becomes your life. Even if you don’t always realize it. And time away, even just mentally, does matter.

Looking for job social life balance

As much as I encourage you to love your job and build good work relationships, life is a whole lot richer if we surround ourselves with friends from a variety of places. And if you’re spending most of your social capital on your work-based relationships, maybe a reader’s words will get you thinking:

The social effects of losing my job was something else I wasn’t prepared for at all. It never occurred to me that about 90% of my social life was directly related to my job. My previous job was very social and every day I had lunch with co-workers or a vendor. Almost overnight I was spending the entire day by myself.

What about your work relationships?

Having a good job social life and strong work relationships can be important. Not only can it make the job more pleasant, it’s an essential part of working smart and building a solid social network. But what percent of your time and energy do you give work relationships in relation to your whole life?

Early in my career, I avoided getting too close to anyone at work, because I didn’t want my social life to cross over with my job life.  And I just hated being forced to socialize with my colleagues, as many places do to encourage camaraderie and teamwork.

For some, depending on their particular job and preferences, keeping a distance may the right choice. Although I’ve learned that it does pay to give in to the forced (uh … highly encouraged) socialization if you can at all bring yourself to do so. Even for introverts like me.

A question of setting boundaries

On the other hand,  some people bring 100% of who they are right into the workplace from day one and set no boundaries whatsoever. Again, while I think in most cases workplace boundaries are a really good thing, there may be circumstances where this works for an individual. Although I do want to mention one very extroverted in-your-face woman I helped hire for a senior manager’s  job.

Turns out she had almost no boundaries and spent all her lunches with just the same few members of her staff. Often gossiping about other co-workers. Unfortunately,  she was not good at interpreting the organizational culture, which highly discouraged such behavior. And, for this and other reasons, she eventually lost her job.

Anyone have a good balance scale?

 As for me … after all these years, I’ve found that a mix of both works best. Finding the balance – as that reader suggests. Apart from the good friendships I retain to this day, there have been great social networking benefits.

Friends I’ve met in former jobs have been there for me many times over the years, pointing me to cool new job opportunities. (And, of course, I’ve done my best to return the favor in one way or another.) Then again, as I said before, there are also many situations where creating a professional distance is exactly the right approach.

My way of looking at it is there is no absolute rule that works in all cases. For me, it’s kind of like great art … you know it when you see it. But whatever your preference turns out to be, work-life balance is well worth considering. Does yours need tweaking?

~ Ronnie Ann

How’s your work-life balance? Is it working for you? Will it work for you in the future?

[NOTE:  Post updated in 2020]

More articles you may enjoy

How YOU Can Make a Difference at Work Today

How Changing Your Attitude Can Change Your Job!

7 Reasons People Don’t Enjoy Volunteering (& Ways To Help)

Career Success? All I Do Is Work!

Are You Tired of Being Judged By Your Job?

Approval Seeking: Who Are You Really Trying To Impress?

What Makes a Job Good?

The Non-Linear Path to Happiness at Work

Pros and Cons of Flirting With a Coworker

Should I Go Out With My Boss If He Asks Me?

Work Friend Is Asking For Money. What Do I Say?

Overly Friendly Coworker Wants To Be Friends!

I’ve been thinking about what makes a job good. And who gets to decide if it’s really good or not. (Hint: The decider probably should be you.)

Many, many moons ago I found this poem in a little joke book. It made me laugh at the time, and, for whatever reason, stuck in my head and has stayed there ever since:

Don’t worry if your job is small

Or your rewards are few

Remember that the mighty oak

Was once a nut like you!

Well …  I was only 9 when I found the poem. And I didn’t have to worry about paying for stuff like rent or food. But there was a kernel of wisdom that always stayed with me.

It reminded me that what is true for us now is not always true. And that life can provide for a future we can’t even imagine today. Not bad stuff. So as I sat down tonight to work on a post about what makes a job good, for some reason those comforting words popped into my head. And they brought a smile.

I began thinking about the phrases “small jobs” and “few rewards”.  What exactly do they mean? Isn’t the way a job feels really in the eyes of the beholder? And just what does make a job good for you?

With a good job does size matter? [Read more…]

A friend just sent me a YouTube video of birds singing in the woods. I was totally consumed by something I was writing at the time, and my first thought was “This is stupid. Take a nature break NOW?”

But as I’ve learned over the years, sometimes it pays to stop, take a sec, and reassess. “What the heck,” I thought. “Worth a shot.” So I sat and listened. And, despite my old buddy skepticism, I was soon smiling. I felt myself breathe out and begin to relax. Hadn’t even realized how unrelaxed I was.

Science behind taking a nature break.

[Read more…]

When I was a little girl, I watched a lot. And listened. Most kids do. And although my parents probably never thought about it, I also learned about work from them. Whether we realize it or not, kids are learning about work all the time from things parents and other people say. And from tone of voice. Even body language.

Things we teach our kids about work

Most parents make a conscious effort to help their kids learn about life. But it’s hard to fully realize all the things we convey to our kids unintentionally. Sometimes even when we think we are sending good messages. And that includes what kids are learning about work from us.

If you can take a moment to go back in time and think about what you saw in your own household, I bet you’ll remember things that your parents never realized you saw. Or heard. Or just felt, almost as if the knowledge was transmitted through the air. [Read more…]

I am sure many of you have had the thought at some point in your career “What if I never find my dream job?” Or, what if my dream job, once I do find it, is not what I want it to be?

It’s hard to keep dreaming when doubts creeps in. Or when we start to learn the harsh realities of what our dream job is like in the light of day — or dark of night. (I want to be a movie star, but do I really have to get up at 3am for a shoot?)

Role of dream jobs in our lives

[Read more…]

Dolce far niente. “It’s sweet to do nothing” in Italian. But for so many, doing nothing feels wrong. They need to be accomplishing something tangible, or they feel like they’re failing somehow. Time wasted. But is it really??

Of course not. We all need time to unwind and replenish both strength and spirit. I’m a big fan of remembering to build in regular, ample time for shaking off the “musts” and “shoulds”.

Maybe it’s just a few minutes during the workday to let your mind wander. Or as many days in a row as you can give yourself for renewal. And for new ideas to have time to blossom. Something we all need, but so often deny ourselves.

So, I’ll be taking some time off to see what might come to the surface. Or to have absolutely nothing of tangible value occur. Time off without goals, since the real value is simply in the sweet nothing.

Time to do nothing is so important!

Please join me in giving yourself permission to take some time to not accomplish anything.  Even a few minutes of meditation or nothingness every day can do so much. And if you can manage more, all the better.

Just don’t stay hooked to your cell phone and to work, ok?

Too many bosses don’t realize the importance of letting people just disconnect without constant work calls. Productivity does NOT increase by keeping people in constant hamster-on-a-wheel mode.

  ⇒  MORE:   6 Healthy Things You Can Do At Work (In a Few Minutes)

There are many great reasons to love Twitter, including the role tweeting has played in political activism and social good. So why am I bothering you with this article about Twitter addiction?

Because we’re in a time when our brains are being targeted from all directions. And we don’t even realize the extent to which this is happening. Twitter addiction is very real. With little effort, it rewards your brain in an instant with things we humans crave: immediate attention and feedback.

Power clicking addictions has over us

These are rewards we often do not get in person. Instead, we’ve learned to feel rewarded at a distance. One or more steps removed from face-to-face human contact. And we’ve even come to treasure that connection, sometimes giving it more value than actual in-person human contact.

Plus, as a highly-addictable bonus, Twitter (as well as other social media) also offers the ability to give and get “likes.” And, as silly as that may seem, this makes us feel even more valued. Best of all, it takes little thought or effort to bestow this reward on others.

Adding to the temptation, social media companies like Twitter exist to grow. And in order to grow, they need more clicks — more eyeballs on their pages. That’s why their marketing is devoted to getting you “hooked” — and to getting you to click and like and follow and come back as often as possible.

Cow Clicker Story

[Read more…]

A reader, Diana, wrote to say that she has a really good job and what many would call career success. And this didn’t happen by accident. She worked hard to get to this point. But what she wanted me to know most is: “All I do is work!”

They say we reap what we sow. But is it fair that lots of work only wins you the opportunity to do even more work? Is work-life balance just a myth for successful people?

Does “All I do is work” ring a bell?

[Read more…]

If you feel that you don’t enjoy volunteering, you are not alone. A lot of people go into a volunteer experience with the best of intentions. But they wind up disappointed by something that should be making them feel good.

Does that mean you should give up volunteering for good? Or that you just have to suck it up since it might be good for your career? Or simply that doing good doesn’t have to feel good.

Reasons People Don’t Enjoy Volunteering

Here are things people have told me about their own volunteer experiences: [Read more…]