What If You’re Not Good At What You Love?

If you’re not good at what you love, do you stop yourself from doing it? A friend recently asked for help with something I had almost no expertise in. Luckily, the person understood that and asked me to help anyway. And I loved doing it. I mean really LOVED it.

I would go to sleep thinking about the project and wake up ready and eager to try new ideas. Despite my normal slow-to-wake morning mode. Believe me … although I love the freedom of consulting, most jobs do not get my juices flowing this way.

We have to be practical, right?

Since this was a limited-time project and I really wasn’t very good at it (although I gave my all), I guess I can just store it as a good memory and get on with the work I really know how to do … business process analysis and project management. (Did I just put you to sleep?)

Well, not so fast. Here’s a little career secret … I had absolutely no idea how to do most of the stuff I’m good at now. At least not when I started. Sure, I had some natural abilities that helped me muddle through.

But there were many times when I was up against the unknown and just had to learn the hard way … sink or swim. And I didn’t always swim. But I oh how learned to doggy paddle and then learned from each failure!

So what is “practical”?

While I’m not suggesting we drop the work that pays the rent or feeds our children, there is a part of us that needs to be fed too. Yet here I am now, face to face with a new thing I actually love doing.

And rather than seeing it as a gift, I started looking at all the obstacles. How wonderful it felt doing it. How heavy it felt in my mind afterward, when the old fear & self-doubt programming wheels started turning.

Old internal programming at work

How often do we get offered a first-hand chance to find a new love? Even if you’re not good at what you love, shoving it away makes no sense. We do that all too often not to feel the tug.

But there are ways you can embrace these things that call, and find a way to bring it into your life. Even if the shape is a little different than originally imagined. So what makes us keep our distance?

Bet you can relate to the “obstacles”

• I’ll never be an expert at this and since so many others are, why bother.
• I’m too old to take on a major learning project. (As if I haven’t taken on at least 4 or 5  jobs/projects in just the last few years that plunged me into totally new worlds!)
• I can’t make a living at it. (Well, not yet. Duh. You have to learn how to do it well. And anyway … so what?)
• Even if I get good at the skills, maybe my ideas aren’t worthwhile. (Oh pullease! How can you know if you never try?)

Our good old friend awareness

Luckily I have reached a point where, even if I start playing old programming like this, I am aware enough to catch myself doing it. That alone is a big help. Probably the most important skill I’ve picked up in the last few years.

And so, I am starting to look at how to take my newly realized passion and bring it into my life in some way on a more regular basis. Already researching books and online resources as well as checking out classes at a local continuing ed program.

But I’m also looking at what aspects of this newfound love might be brought into other things I already do.  And with some extra time and focus (and a little creative job morphing), this could add more joy to my regular work (or play).

Deciding to take on something new

I’ve read time and again that the people who succeed big are the ones willing to put in long hours and keep going, no matter how many times they get it wrong at first. Bill Gates comes to mind.

In Malcolm Gladwell’s book Outliers: The Story of Success, he says it takes some combination of circumstance / opportunity — and about 10,000 hours — to master a skill. This is best if started young according to Gladwell. But it’s never too late to learn new things at whatever level of achievement we reach.)

So does that mean you can simply practice acting for 10,000 hours, for instance, and wind up winning an Oscar? Or write for 10,000 hours and get a Pulitzer Prize? Well … probably not. Although someone somewhere will do just that.

But even if  you don’t achieve the soaring heights of those definitions of success, you do get better and better. And that in itself can feel darn good. Also. that level of commitment and dedication to something you care deeply about can also translate to other areas of your life, including your career.

And benefits don’t stop there

Each time you watch yourself succeed by improving (to whatever extent) based solely on YOUR efforts and determination, you learn to believe in yourself more — and are less likely to shy away from trying new things that add to your life. Now that’s success we all can aim for!

As for all those nasty little negative programs that run in our heads to “protect” us (i.e., keep us from taking on things with unknown outcomes), we can still, at any age, decide to take on something new (and help change that programming).

Using the internet, libraries, friends, someone in the field you dare to ask for advice, formal training, good old trial and error (whatever the method), we can simply learn a skill to the best of our ability — which is all anyone can ever do. And that’s certainly good enough if it’s something we truly love.

After all, if the very least that happens is we get to spend time immersed in something wonderful … well, that’s a net gain any way I look at it!

“It’s never too late to be

what you might have been.” – George Eliot

 

About the author…

Ronnie Ann, founder of Work To the Wise and Work Coach Cafe, bases her real-world advice on her many years as an organizational consultant where she helped interview and hire people, added to a certificate from NYU in Career Planning & Development, as well as her many adventures as a serial job seeker.