Although I know there are men who feel this way too, I’ve met way too many intelligent women who are just plain afraid of numbers. Or maybe rather than a fear of numbers for some people it’s simply that they don’t really connect to them.

Words can help tell a story. Words can delivery nuances of meaning. But numbers? What can they tell us? Well, they can tell us a lot. Especially if you make them your friends.

I’ve always loved numbers. As a kid, I did well in math (don’t hate me) and even used to follow stocks in the local newspaper. I’d pretend I had money invested in them. And watched the numbers (prices) tell me a story of value but also market psychology. My own fantasy stock market!

But I get that MANY people, especially women, do not share my delight. Instead, when they see numbers or hear someone talking about them, their eyes begin to glaze over. And their fear of numbers sets off  a brain alert: “Danger. Danger. Numbers coming. Shut off brain. And get me out of here!”

Making friends with numbers matters

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I just saw something online that said if you work hard you will succeed. While I love the simplicity of that thought, unfortunately it’s just not true. There are a lot of you out there working your butts off and not getting the recognition or the money you deserve. And, for many of you, you certainly aren’t succeeding as far as actually enjoying your work.

So is the answer to work even harder? Probably not — at least not without making sure what you are doing will get you somewhere you want to go. Success comes in many forms. But none of them are the result of hard work only. So what’s the rest of the formula?

Examples of working hard w/o big payoff

Before we get to the rest of the formula, let’s look at a few examples where hard work doesn’t lead to anything but frustration and more hard work.

• Mary works at a pharmacy where her manager is great at not being around when things get busy. Or when emergencies happen. So Mary winds up working long hours and making sure everything doesn’t fall apart. She’s done this for ten years and is still in debt. And her boss just bought a new boat.
• Steve went into business for himself. And the moment he gave notice to his 9 to 5 job was one of the highlights of his life. But now he works harder than ever — about 100 hours a week — and yet his business is always trying to find new customers. The joy he felt initially has long since faded. And his family never gets to see him.
• Laura joined a fast food company that made it look like she could work her way up to owning her own franchise one day. But she has watched person after person move ahead, while she’s always the first in and first out from her shift. And yes … she is a hard worker. Everyone says that.

So what’s the problem. Why isn’t hard work working for Mary, Steve, and Laura? And why do people who don’t work nearly as hard as they do get to succeed? [Read more…]

“He’s too soft to succeed.” I’ve heard it said in meetings and even in post-interview discussions. But what exactly does that mean? And how did that idea get planted in so many business minds?

There’s a lot packed into those few words so often spoken as truth — yet very little of it of any use to good business practice. In fact, labels like “soft” can actually wind up influencing staff performance negatively. And missing the point altogether.

Employees frequently act as they perceive they need to. And phrases like that leave a lingering impression that can turn into a form of self-censoring. Meanwhile, judgers judge as they think they need to for them to succeed. And, in the process of everyone trying to be what’s expected of them, authenticity gets lost.

Cliched thinking is lazy management

It’s easy to use phrases that basically minimize or altogether remove the human side of work and business. Let’s not give power, they tell us, to things that aren’t easy to quantify on paper or in a good ole pie chart! You know the old sayings:

• No pain no gain.
• Survival of the fittest.
• Winning is everything.
• The end justifies the means.
• It’s just business, not personal.
• Being too “nice” will get you eaten alive.

But well-known shortcuts in language like these limit healthy discussion of the bigger — and more accurate — picture. And they also help cut off healthy workplace behavior, including giving value to emotional intelligence and the human resource side of work … a company’s most valuable asset.

Without us humans, business  just isn’t happening. Even robots need humans to create them … at least as of now. [Read more…]

We all know online time is addictive. And … let’s face it … fun. Social media. Google search. Wandering down an internet rabbit hole and finding all kinds of interesting things you never knew existed. But too much time online at work is NOT a great job skill. Unless you are doing your actual job, of course.

I know that escaping into your computer or mobile device can often feel like it’s the one thing keeping you sane in your job. Been there. Done that. And to a point a little escape time is good. But I just want you to know that there can also be downsides that are hurting you.

Lots of time online? Why it matters.

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So much of what we do in our careers centers around expectations, attitude, mindset, and perspective. And all this rises right to the top when you’re starting an entry level job. But while you’ll need patience, strategy, and determination to succeed, they’re not always the first things that come to mind. Not even close!

Whether you’re new to the job scene or starting a fresh career, you want to be recognized for who you really are. And not for the menial tasks (or so they often feel) you’ll need to handle. But that can take time. And you need to know how to approach things in the meantime.

My first entry level job mistakes

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Looking to change something about the kind of work you do? Let’s say you love your career, but not your job. Or you’ve never found a job you love. Or you realize the job scene is changing as a whole — and you want to make sure you’re still marketable. One possible solution is creating a specialized career niche for yourself.

Niche careers let you target what you can offer an employer — and what you really want to do for a living. The Cambridge Dictionary defines niche as “a job or position that is very suitable for someone, especially one that they like: [Example] He has carved / made a niche for himself as a financial advisor.”

How much to specialize niche career?

It’s up to you. Just like products in a supermarket, careers can be kept to the general (ice cream) or somewhat specialized (vanilla ice cream) or whittled way down to the very rare and specific (coffee ice cream with marshmallows, chocolate chips, and swirls of burnt caramel.)

But there’s a trade-off: the number of actual jobs you’ll qualify for. You’ll find a lot more job listings under general categories. But you’ll also have a lot more competition with perhaps not enough to differentiate you.

Now if you are great at your niche, an employer (with the help of a recruiter) may actually come looking for you. Or at least when you see the keywords and key phrases describing what they’re looking for in a candidate, you’ll have your well-honed niche skills to get you to the front of the “yes” pile.

Also, the more expert you become, while the total number of jobs may be less, your chances of getting those jobs may increase. But you better keep those skills sharp and updated.

And you also need to take into account whether you want to be be seen as a specialist to the extent you might not be seen as someone who can take on a less niched, wider scope role in the company.

Finding specialty you’d enjoy

[Read more…]

First, let me say that I’m a big believer in thinking positively. Seeing yourself succeeding. Believing that there’s always a way — even if not exactly as you first imagined. But that often gets muddled with the idea of negative thinking always being bad. And defining “negative” thinking as anything not immediately seen as positive!

How some define negative thinking

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Career change fear is normal. It’s partly about fear of the unknown. And about making mistakes. But also a deeper fear that you won’t be enough, no matter how hard you try.  And that dreams are just that — silly fantasies best left unexplored.

More often than not, our fears are the biggest obstacle to change of any kind. And it leaves us afraid to even take that first step. But sometimes just understanding and recognizing the roadblocks can help them seem smaller — and less daunting. It may make it easier to at least put one toe in the water. And then the next.

Often, the simple act of giving yourself the permission to say “let’s try” can set real change in motion. Or at least give yourself a chance to grow and explore new things. And maybe even see what’s behind the next door you never before imagined,

Even if you don’t ever reach your original goal, the act of trying and seeing where that leads is a pretty cool thing. And that alone can help you go further the next time.

So let’s try to understand what’s really going on. And look at some steps you can take to help.

Basic career change fears

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This really is about your career goals — and career change. But first a slight detour to one of my favorite films, What About Bob?

It’s a Bill Murray comedy that uses the idea of taking small steps to help create change. In the film, the therapist,  Dr. Leo Marvin (played by Richard Dreyfuss), writes a “groundbreaking” book called “Baby Steps”. While the laughs and sweetness of this film are only enhanced by the questionable real-life skills of Dr. Marvin, his book turns out to be a wonderful revelation for us all.

Feels too big? Think smaller!

Basically, it tells us not to let the immensity of a situation overwhelm us. Often, just thinking about goals that seem too big stops us in our tracks. But the book suggests we can get past any physical or (often more daunting) mental roadblocks by breaking down what feels BIG into smaller, manageable steps — baby steps.

Using baby steps, Bob manages to experience a lot of new things. (I won’t spoil it for you if you haven’t seen it.) And in career goals too, baby steps can play a major role. Maybe even bridging the difference between a life of “I could have” vs a life of “I did it!”

Career goals the baby step way

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Action. Taking real action. It’s the one thing we have control of during tough times. And by moving forward and learning new skills — or whatever else might open up new doors for yourself — you are choosing to let yourself hope.

You are also providing a practical (and hopefully engaging) diversion that will aim your thoughts in a more positive and useful direction. Tough times let our minds wander. And dwell on things like past failures or the vast, oh-so-scary unknown.

Not only wasted effort, but this can lead to reinforcing and adding to the darkest parts. And by giving starring roles to fear and dread, you wind up underplaying all that you still do have and can rely upon.

Why learn new skills in tough times?

[Read more…]