Jobs can look oh so wonderful in a company’s job listing. “Wow! That job description is exactly what I’m looking for.” But then, if you actually get an offer and accept, reality begins. Have I made a mistake? Is this a good job or bad job?
And just like Dorothy in Oz, it’s pretty much all about things you can’t see behind the curtain or know about in advance. For some unlucky jobseekers the truth is revealed on day one. But for most of us, it takes a while for the curtain to be pulled open.
The role of workplace culture
Workplace culture plays a key role. As much as you (hopefully) did your best to research what your new company is really like, how someone else feels about the place may be very different than your take on things. And even if your interviewer was forthcoming, their view of the day-to-day is based on who they are. And that doesn’t always mesh with who you are.
This is not to suggest that you don’t research a company before saying “yes” — or even interviewing there. But surprises do happen. Maybe it’s the entire company, or maybe just a “power group” that affects your work life. I once even wound up working for a non-profit that was essentially a cult — or at least cult-like in how it was run by the my-way-or-the-highway leader.
Then again, it may be as simple as your being an introvert and the company expecting you to hang out with them. Attend social events together. Eat lunch with coworkers rather than alone. And after awhile if you choose to avoid all that, you may be left out of the loop. No helpful “water cooler” info and maybe even no chance at the juicy assignments.
And yet you’re doing nothing wrong. You did nothing wrong. Jobs come with all kinds of unexpected revelations. But hopefully they also come with a good deal of pleasant surprises too — if we give them a chance.
Why how you feel matters
Obviously the way you feel day in and day out at your job matters. No one should spend their days feeling miserable. But you may actually be missing out on ways to improve things for yourself when you spend more and more of your day at work and elsewhere focusing on how awful it is and / or why people don’t like you.
Some jobs truly are awful and if that’s the case it’s time to start looking for a better one. But often it’s hard to see where you can take self-help action — which gives you positive momentum — when you feel so overwhelmed and trapped by all that’s not working for you.
So what can you do?
Research deeply. Absolutely take time to research the company including setting up a google alert for the company name and any employee you know about. Most job seekers do look at business elements, which is important. But also keep your eyes and ears open for a taste of what working there and the people are like.
During the interview. Try to come up with questions that helps you get a feel for what you daily routine might be like. And, if you’re an introvert or whatever your special needs might be, try to come up with some questions to help. Something like “What would my typical day be like?” or “What would a coworker expect of me” or “What would my coworkers hope I’m like?”
After the interview. Check your feelings. Both during the interview and a few hours later when you’re at home. Did you get a good feel from the interviewer and what they said? Is there anything bothering you? If some bell is ringing inside, please don’t ignore it.
Good jobs are hard to get so we often push any caution feelings aside. Thus is not the time to do that. So if you do get a second interview, make sure to try to address any of your concerns. Continue to try to get a feel for the company and job, in a way that still keeps you in a positive light if course. Don’t accuse. Pleasantly explore!
Who you are also shapes how a job feels
The old phrase “wherever you go there you are” is even more true when it comes to a job. We bring who we are — our history and all the feelings about ourselves even ways others can push our buttons — with us. And so as we start to evaluate the job and the people we work with, we may do so with filters on. And we may misinterpret things based on past experiences.
⇒ Role of Communication Filters In the Workplace
How we fit into and interpret the culture around us becomes a Rorschach test of sorts. Even as we’re fitting in well, insecurities may take over and color our interactions negatively. And so it’s important to make sur we aren’t bringing those negative feelings with us and mistakenly attaching them to people around us.
Again, not to suggest you ignore your feelings. Many times they’re absolutely on target. Just take the time to make sure that what you feel is based on the now. Some jobs that feel bad really are. But many times we’re overlaying our filtered feelings onto hat in effect are perfectly typical office behaviors. With no ill will or targeted negativity meant.
Don’t forget networking
Having people we feel comfortable with at work can make a big difference in how a job feels. So it helps to find coworkers you trust to check in with when things feel off just in case. This is not about gossip or drilling down about why “this job sucks”. That only makes you more miserable and keeps you further away from seeing how this job can work for you. It’s about support — which is even better when it’s mutual support.
Building networking connections is probably one of the strongest career moves you can make. The earlier the better. And, when you’ve created connections within your workplace, those supportive relationships can also help you feel more included in the everyday — and as a result open up perhaps heretofore hidden parts of your job that you can feel good about!
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