Do Bosses Take Advantage of Women?

Even in the 21st century when gender equality is supposed to be a given, quite a few bosses still take advantage of women. Probably not as obviously (although there are those who let it all show), but nonetheless you can still find this happening in offices of all types.

And the most frustrating part of this? The woman doesn’t always realize it’s happening. Or that they have options, even if it means eventually heading to a new job where they will be treated more fairly.

How do bosses take advantage?

First let’s be clear. Some bosses take advantage of everyone — men and women alike. But there are subtle ways that a boss will take advantage of women and they themselves may not be aware of what they’re doing.

These are some of the main ways it happens. (I’ll explain more about the “why” in the next section.)

• Flirting (or more) – Well, this is pretty obvious to anyone reading this. It’s a power move. But the boss may just see it as acceptable “boys will be boys / locker room” behavior, even though they’re not in a locker room. Or they’re testing the waters just in case they get a green light. (And yes, women bosses can cross boundaries too.)
• More boring assignments – Surprisingly often, women employees get the more boring, less center-stage assignments or daily tasks. (And again it could be a female boss, in this case minimizing contributions of women employees. It happens.)
• Overloading them with work – Women have traditionally been reluctant to say no to work assignments … or they want to prove they’re valuable by doing more. And often that means work gets piled on their desks.
• Assume no need to promote – Once again, historically less likely to complain or stand up for what they deserve, women can go for a far longer time without a promotion or even a well-deserved raise.
• Leave them out of the loop – The tradition of “watercooler talk” or wherever the out-of-office meeting place might be (even a golf course) has long excluded women. While this is changing more and more, many times women employees still don’t hear about upcoming projects or company changes the way those in the loop do.

Why bosses take advantage

I guess, as we saw with flirting discussed above, the answer is pretty obvious. They take advantage of women because they can. Or because they truly are oblivious to how unfair they’re being. And because often women are less likely to recognize that getting more done isn’t always better for them.

And sometimes it’s as simple as the boss knows the woman will get the job done well. Someone they know they can trust and rely upon. An old pattern many men bosses fail to recognize — and one that the women may not recognize either. And once again, the work piles up … maybe on your desk.

So what can you do?

Well, the first thing to do is realize that you have value to the company and to yourself. And that your value doesn’t have to be proved by being a voiceless workhorse or doormat. Self image plays a huge role in what you project to others … and how that in turn eventually sets things up for yourself.

Early on in my career, I found it helped to have a strong, positive image of myself … and a strong positive vision of what I can contribute to a company. And that (in most cases) I could help make good things happen for myself given time. I also learned to set boundaries, both in my own head and in how I took on work assignments.

And none of my success in boundary setting or otherwise was achieved by complaining or acting like I’m being taken advantage of (“poor me”) — even if I was to some extent. Instead, what worked was doing my job well but also patiently finding openings for when I could make those good things happen. All the time believing I’ll find a way!

I kept my eyes and ears open (schmoozed a bit — see watercooler talk link above) and then expressed the desire for projects that I could take on and shine with, helping shape how the boss and others saw me. Positive with a smile — or “pleasantly aggressive” as one boss called me.

⇒  EXTRA:  What If You Work for a Bully Boss?

 

More posts to help

Job Morphing: 20 Ways To Improve Your Job & Career

What To Do If Your Boss Takes You For Granted

5 Ways Complaining About Your Boss Hurts You

 

So You’re Not Getting a Raise … Again?

Playing the Blame Game at Work

How Do You Handle an Impossible Work Assignment?

 

Why Are Receptionists So Undervalued (and Underpaid)?

Why Being Good at Your Job Isn’t Always Enough

Boss Won’t Let Me Transfer To a Different Department

 

And just in case you do need to leave

⇒   How To Quit a Job (Without Hurting Yourself)