On the topic of how to build work relationships, a frustrated reader writes about the way her boss perceives her actions at work. And her non-actions. She also feels confused by what her boss said. It doesn’t feel right to her.

Well, sometimes you just need to trust the feedback and take charge of changing how you’re seen. Even if it’s not your usual way, the benefits can far outweigh the effort of breaking through any initial resistance.

And this is especially true with workplace relationships. Luckily there are things you can do to help improve things. So here’s what Natalia shared — and my answer that includes a few tips to help in general.

Natalia’s frustrating situation at work

Dear Ronnie Ann,

I read several articles and stories here and decided to tell my story as well. I moved to a new country five years ago. And, although I already have worked for two years back in my home country, decided to take another education in my new homeland.

I also took placements two times during my study and got excellent recommendation letters from the both employers. I hoped to find job quickly as I learned good skills both during my previous successful work places and my education as well. [Read more…]

We’ve all heard the phrase “judged by the company you keep.” But what exactly does that mean? If you simply hang around with someone, is that enough to get you labeled with their faults?

And, conversely, if you hang around with people with great reputations, does that mean you slide by if you’re not exactly squeaky clean? I’m guessing you already know the answer to that one is mostly “no”. But, it may at least make people rethink any previous negative conclusions about you.

Why company you keep matters

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I recently published an article about the downside of gossiping at work. But that might raise the question “What exactly is the difference between gossip and conversation?” And because there can be a lot of hard feelings as you venture into that downside territory, I think this is a question well worth exploring.

Also, while we’re at it, it’s worth looking at the nature of gossip itself. Is all gossip necessarily bad? Can there be gossip that’s simply fun and harms no one? Or are you just kidding yourself if you think gossip can be harmless.

So what exactly is gossip? [Read more…]

As much fun as it is to gossip, the hard fact is that gossip can hurt people. And it can hurt longtime relationships. And when it comes to gossip at work, you’re opening the door to serious and lasting damage. Even if your intentions were totally innocent.

While seemingly harmless at first, workplace gossip can do real harm to your workplace relationships. And that can wind up coming back to bite you – leaving a lasting impression you might never undo.

So what is gossip?

In simplest terms, when you share personal and / or private information about someone with another person(s), that’s gossip. Even if the information is true (and so often it’s just rumor or half truths), you’re making someone else the topic of idle chatter.

Workplace gossip can be especially seductive. As we all know too well, work can be boring at times. Gossip is often juicy and provides a nice break in the routine. It also opens the door to lots of maybes and what ifs, which can get passed on as fact along with the original bit of gossip.

⇒   Difference Between Gossip and Conversation?

Ways gossip at work can hurt

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If a work friend is asking for money, no matter what you say lending can be uncomfortable. If you say no to letting them borrow money, you feel like you’ve let them down. Or, they may think you don’t believe in them. Or trust them.

But if you say yes to loaning money to a friend, what if they don’t pay you back? Especially a work friend. That can get really uncomfortable. And messy. I’ve had that happen twice. Yup. It took me a while to learn how to say no. But also, when and how to say yes.

My times loaning money to friends

Story #1:  Wife of work friend is asking for money

I once worked with a man who was very supportive and often helped me out when we had tight deadlines. After a while, his wife and I also became friends. She and I met at work gatherings and found we had a lot in common. [Read more…]

To date my boss or not to date my boss. That is the question. Well, at least it’s a question for some of us. So how does a rational, flesh and blood employee answer the “should I go out with my boss” question?

Let’s start by admitting that it’s not easy to find people to date. And sometimes you just have to take a chance in life. But if the employee would also like to keep their job, how do they weigh the benefits vs the risk of dating a boss? Let’s try to figure it out.

Wondering if I should go out with boss

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Flirting at work is a touchy subject, so you might be a little surprised that I’m including the upside of flirting with a coworker as well as the downside. But I try my best to be real on this site. And there are definitely things we get from flirting. That’s why we do it!

But, of course, there are also really good reasons to be careful. Both for the people involved and for your ability to keep working at your current job. Especially in this age of increased awareness.

Pros of flirting with coworker

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