About the exit interview
An exit interview (if requested) becomes part of the formal job termination process. Usually offered when the employee chooses to leave, it can also be requested of an employee who was fired.
And just so you know … though a bit tricky to handle the “no” smoothly, you do not have to go through this if you have any reasons to hesitate.
Exit interviews: many shapes & forms
Exactly how it’s done depends on the employer. And depends on what they’re looking to get from it. But as a rule it’s a one-on-one meeting set up by the employer to give the employee a final chance to share their thoughts about the job and company. (More on that soon.)
Of course, job terminations and parting of ways can also come in many shapes and forms, such as:
- Warm, well-attended farewell party.
- Minimal but respectful acknowledgement of your leaving.
- Escorted out just to be safe, but references still possible.
- You become persona non grata forever more.
And probably only the first two would even request an exit interview. Again, they’re usually framed as an information-gathering session. Although you never know what any employer might decide.
But when it comes to the actual exit interview … it all depends on whether you’re the one leaving or staying. And having been on both sides, I can assure you that it can be uncomfortable from either side of the table. Even if it’s basically a friendly parting of the ways.
Exit interview for person leaving
Every bit of nervousness and discomfort you might feel sitting across from your boss during a job evaluation seems to magnify as you wait for this last officially requested performance. I use that word intentionally, because you are on the stage.
Should you need references or perhaps want to get hired again one day by the company, you want to leave a good feeling behind. So when they start asking questions, it’s smart to not just let the chitchat flow — even if they make it feel very informal. What gets written up goes in your permanent file. (For those companies that keep such records.)
Taking the high road
So when they (usually Human Resources) ask you things about your coworkers and bosses / supervisors, try to keep it positive. This is not the time to let it all hang out. Especially if any of the people you want to dish the dirt on might need to be a reference.
They’ll also probably ask your thoughts about the job, how you might improve things, and similar “we want to create a better workplace” type questions. But my thoughts are “Where were these questions when I was still working here? Maybe I would have stayed if you had focused on making the place better. Or valued my opinion more.”
Of course, if you do have something useful to share, I’m not saying to hold back. But really think about what your saying so that it doesn’t come off as harsh criticism. Or you don’t come off as an annoying know-it-all. And one who, btw, never bothered to share their wonderful ideas when they still worked there.
Exit interview from employer side
As far as employers go, the real reasons for conducting these interviews may cross over into “looking for dirt” territory. Although for the most part it could simply be gathering information that goes into files and never gets looked at again. Or does get looked at, and maybe even provides some helpful insights — but maybe not.
Or, it might be that someone long ago, when creating the Employee Handbook and related policies, decided to include exit interviews. And so they conduct them. With different people using them in different ways, depending on who’s in charge at the time.
But some employers do dig for that dirt. And then they wind up using your words (even pulled out of context) to justify certain decisions. So again, my suggestion would be to tread lightly.
You might think that it’s a good time to stick it to someone who treated you badly. But office politics are weird. And info in official files can be leaked and shared in a way that hurts other people. And down the road, might come back to bite you.
About saying “no” to exit interview
As I mentioned earlier, you can decline. Personally, I’d go through with it and do my best to keep my answers short and positive. Leaves a better taste in their mouths, I would think. And, you can always steer it toward your future, which is what you are focused on anyway.
But, if you were fired, or there are a lot of hard feelings, maybe a polite “no” is the wisest choice. So much can come out that you might not intend. Especially when still raw emotions are tweaked. And especially if the person wants to pump you for more juicy details.
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